Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Smoking in the shower.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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Being fat

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

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When you don't have enough money for something, you just take a tiny bit of money from your siblings and parents room at a time so they don't notice any different

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.