When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.