I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

I can only play a piano with my right hand

When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

Being fat

Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.