Mayada stupid

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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Fantasize about shooting one of those trucks that have some sort of liquid in them and watching them blow up.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.