A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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I hit the frig after sex

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.