log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.