Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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I hold my breath in elevators

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.