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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

I only EVER take my watch off if I need tto put on big gloves, like cricket gloves.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Make up a song to yourself.

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.