Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

I have a phobia of incest

The older I get the more honest I get

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

Use my phone to see what time it is

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.