I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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test how many stares you can scale in one step

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.