When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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i masturbate with my feet

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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I **** with no hands.

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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I was the real Stig...

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.