(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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I Masturbate Daily.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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i masturbate with my feet

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.