Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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freak out if poster or pictures eyes are looking at me and can't have pictures in my room of famous people, however if I'm out and scared i have to have the pictures on my phone look at me for safety.....really wondering if any one else has this

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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only read the short jokes on this website

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.