Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

blow nose. look at kleenex.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

when you bleed you suck your own blood

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

thumb_up thumb_down -31

My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

I gotta get down of Friday

thumb_up thumb_down -79

i use dental dams

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

thumb_up thumb_down -92

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Moral: Damn I clicked on pointless super powers how did I get here! Moral: I wrote the "thing only I do" below :P

thumb_up thumb_down -44

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.