At night when alone in my bed...I sometimes pretend like I got hit by a car or something, and my loved one is there with me...and I act out my last words...and how I would act. I've done this occasionally since I was 5. With different scenario's. Schmee

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Shake my hands frantically back and forth when watching the microwave count down or the printer print, as if it will make them go faster.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

thumb_up thumb_down -109

Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

thumb_up thumb_down -127

I keep thinking a thing is about to fall from the table even though it's not close to the edge

thumb_up thumb_down +18

smoke marijuana

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Have to suddenly poop while shopping (mainly in Wal-Mart), but don't feel like traveling far to the restroom. So I kneel down in whatever aisle I'm in, casually shove my heel up my butt, and pick up some random item from the shelf and pretend to be interested in it. Finally, when the poop is secure in my butt, I'll put the item back and continue my shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Thinking that someone is seeing everything from your eyes while you are using the bathroom, and then quickly looking up to avoid embarassment.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

jack off

thumb_up thumb_down -32

hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

I never let anything go over the toilet when It's open.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Okay so probably like everyone else, when Schapelle Corby was found with drugs on her in bali I thought she was innocent but now since she was let out of the prison I am wondering if she did do it?

thumb_up thumb_down -106

Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.

thumb_up thumb_down -101

When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

thumb_up thumb_down -159

When I'm in a room with other people, no matter who they are, I make myself choose the person I would tolerate the best having sex with just in case of a disaster and we need to procreate.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.