Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

run up the stairs when its night so that the monsters dont catch you

Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

When ever I touch something a certain way I have to touch it again exactly like I did the first time

I ejaculate fire and glory

When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

getting a random wedgie when everybody is looking at me

Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

Walking with your friend talking about everything then you and your friend walk by someone you don't know and it gets awkwardly quiet

When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

cut corners when walking not because it's faster, but because it's more efficient

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.