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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

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Think about breathing...

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Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

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I play out romantic scenarios with myself when I'm alone. We're talking full-blown just straight up talking out loud- to myself, of course. It's not that I'm lonely or anything since I did this when I had a boyfriend anyway (just to clarify, it didn't end because of this XD.) I really just feel like doing it because it's really friggin' entertaining. If you've never done it, well... it's basically like being in a really crappy, low budget soap opera, with a plot that doesn't make any damn sense, staring you as every character and the audience. That's basically the only way I could describe it lol.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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Get scared while I'm doing things on the computer like writing these comments, or other weird stuff because I think there might be a hacker watching my screen.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

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Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture

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When receiving instructions from people one on one, whether it's a man or a woman, I wonder what they would do if I kissed them while they are talking.

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When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.