For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

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Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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Sometimes I lie in bed and wonder what the house would look like upside down.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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Reading all these posts and being reminded that we are all more similar to each other than we think, regardless of whatever group each of us may belong to.

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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Brake for tail-gaters

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Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.