when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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When a teacher at school leaves a line of pen on the big whiteboard, my attention can NOT be drawn from it.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

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I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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When I'm laying in bed and I feel my heartbeat, I turn around so I can't feel it because it makes me feel sick.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.