sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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When reading a book where the main character has the same name as someone I know, I visualize that character in my head as that person.

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Boring car ride? Read every food & drinks rapper you can find .

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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fap

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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I put a small amount of water in glasses and freeze them for hot days when I want a cool drink

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Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

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Set Fire to the Rain

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.