Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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Being so socially awkward that when you have a successful interaction with another human being, you play it in your head over and over again.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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I say random stuff when I wake up. Just to make sure my voice is still working.

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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sitting in your room at night and making imagineary monters or random figures out of things in your room.

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I sit sideways on the toilet because my bony butt fits better that way.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

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I masturbate with sandpaper

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

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When I go to the shops I like to park my car next to a specific coloured car so I can find it afterwards.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.