check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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When calling someone you hang up after 3 or 4 rings because you're tired of waiting rather than it being time to leave a message.

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I hate being called "buddy".

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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I brush my teeth while im in the shower

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Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

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When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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Vote for the other guy

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When walking on stairs, always counting how many of them there are.

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In public,try to make eye contact with most people.

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Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.