Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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read some comments here and wonder if people really do that

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Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

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Stepping on a LEGO block and instantly screaming and leap onto the bed.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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I brush my teeth with the tap on because it sounds weird brushing in silence.

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

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text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

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Wonder if life is just a dream then get a creepy feeling and immediately think happier thoughts.

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Thinking about different guys and how they would be in bed, then thinking im a slut for thinking it...

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I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.