- Things You Think Only You Do

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

Not buying a product you might have otherwise been interested in simply because you think their TV ad is stupid.

i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

Wonder what would happen if you started screaming and defecating in public.

If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

Talk out loud so my brother can hear me because no one ever wrote that they can read your minds. And i want him to know ineed him in my life still so I randomly say things out loud to him on accident. People always look at me with hidden shock wide eyed.

make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

Think of something really hilarious to put on the internet, read the rest of a post, and then forget what you were going to write.

Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

When out I like to "people watch."

suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

im going to kill that person and get away with it

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.