Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

turn the colour down on your tv and pretend what you are watching is an old movie

Sometimes I walk around my house with my eyes closed and pretend I'm blind.

When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here"

Wish I could hang out with some people from this site sometimes.

I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

I apologize, when i bump against things.

when home alone, I sing a song like im performing it in front of a crowd of a thousand people and any object nearby usually becomes my microphone

When on long car rides through the mountains of Cali, look at a fence and pretend its a roller coaster and talk like im on it with a friend. And when the fence ends,name and rate it like it was real -Nirp

repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

I eat ass

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.