I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

if someone i like or want to impress is around i change the song I'm listening to to something that i know they like or something not embarrassing, just in case they ask me what i'm listening to.

if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out

When I'm about to fart, I close my butthole with cupped hand to smell my own fart. Sometimes after I fart, I bend down just to smell the scent.

Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

put a load of loo roll in the loo before taking a dump at work so it silences the landing.

outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

Even if it's something as innocent as a simple google search, I'm still inexplicably terrified when my parents draw near and could potentially see it. I silently flip out and frantically hide it like it's porn or something. ..And I don't even look at porn :I

Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

Sometimes when you are looking down at a book or something you look up because you think you saw a person. Nope it was a tall lamp with a coat hung on it. Find youself periodically looking up every 5 minutes to make sure.

Cope with serious things by not taking them seriously.

Scratch my ass/armpit and HAVE to smell it.

When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

whenever there's a fight on facebook, i sit back and read it and i'm just like "people are stupid hehe"

Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

Enjoy picking off scabs, thick skin around your nails, your nails, or the thick peeling skin left from a blister. Admit it, you love it.

I have never disliked any video on YouTube with not many views ( no matter how bad it is ) because I feel bad for the uploader.

Show desktop when mom or dad walks in.

When someone sits with crossed legs, I notice their lifted foot throb slightly with their pulse. It is really distracting sometimes.

Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.