Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

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i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

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If I drop a piece of candy on the floor, I have to drop another piece so it won,t be lonely

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Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

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Things I did when I was little: Slowly close the fridge door to see the light go out before it is closed all of the way. Put the light switch in between "OFF" and "ON". Walked in to a room and forgot why, walked out then remembered. (STILL DO!) Drew the sun in the corner of the paper. Put a flashlight in your mouth to see yourself, "blush".

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sometimes I get so bored watching tv that I have an incredible urge to throw the remote at the tv. I would never do it, but I always fear I might and break the tv.

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Pick my scabs off and then lick the blood off.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

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become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

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Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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Go to get a drink and by the time you get there you already forgot what you were doing.

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When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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whenever I play I spy I always use very specific things I spy for example if I would say something starting with D and it would be for dust

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when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

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kick something under the fridge that you dont want to pick up

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Close you closet door whenever you are about to go to bed.

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I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

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Sometime i'll see someone or something like a person or a car and visualize a big meteorite smashing then out of nowhere.

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Sometimes when I'm in the shower, I start kicking the bar of soap.

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Whenever I order a lot of food at a fast food place for myself, I order an extra drink just so they think it's for two people.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.