Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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I scratch and sniff.

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.