Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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I pretend that my pillow is the love of my life and kiss it and cuddle it before bed.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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get really freaked out when your in a parking lot and the car next to you starts backing up and you think your moving forward.

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Toss something across the room toward the place it belongs, get excited when it lands upright/ perfectly in place, then immediately regret you weren't recording it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.