I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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Ur mum

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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that time where you open the fridge door and stare at it for like 10 min then close it and walk away?

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Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.