I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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I hit the frig after sex

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.