I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.