sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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I think Frozen is an overrated film

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.