When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Looking at something suggestive on your computer and worrying that someone else in your family can see what you're doing on their computer.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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eat curry and don't complain about its spiciness ...if you're not white

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.