Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Put my hands together the 'other' way

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The older I get the more honest I get

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Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.