When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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Ur mum

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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fap

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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Picking my nose.

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.