If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.