.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.