When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

I was the real Stig...

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

Having the TV turned on when using my laptop or else the silence will make me feel like someone is in my house trying to kill me.

I scratch and sniff.

wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

Vote up your own websites posts, to make them look more popular!

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.