When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I scratch and sniff.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

thumb_up thumb_down -15

When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.