- Things You Think Only You Do

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

I try to sympathize when some celebrity butthole has problems but, I can't.

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

I used to eat bath bubbles

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

Eat the last bowl of ice cream. Then 6 hours later, you wish you hadn't. (sometimes even open the fridge and check whether you actually ate it or not)

Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.