watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

i masturbate with my feet

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

listening to music and not realizing ur favorite song is on until the last word

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

Go for a 10 mile run.

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

When posting these, I'm rarely able to read the words/letters in the box that prove you're human and not some computer virus. Now I'm starting to think I'm not a human......

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

masturbate as soon as the opportunity arrises. "You'll be home alone all day" "Ok, bye.....*fap fap fap*"

When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.