Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

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Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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I think about other women when having sex

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Think of someone you love while trying to fall asleep.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Sneeze for a few minutes when I've eaten too much.

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.