I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

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call someone by a siblings name.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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forget to breathe while listening to ear buds too loudly.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.