- Things You Think Only You Do

make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

being super bored at shool

test how many stares you can scale in one step

Every time you use a vending machine you hope you get lucky and 2 things drop down.

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

Drink alcohol out of styrofoam soda cups on the bus and train.

Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

Poo really loud

Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.