Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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I don't read the terms of service.

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Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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Courtesy flush.

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Imagine punching someone you hate in the face, but when you see them in person you think "Oh s***!!!!" and hide.

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Comment on here and wait a few days and see if I got some likes . CMOOON , You do it .

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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I have memorized my drivers license registration number

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.