when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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get caught up in youtube comment arguments

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

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Feel like puhing the crap out of people who talk loud in public places.

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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KICK THE CAN

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.