Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

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Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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i use my thumb when using a DS instead of using the stylus

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I laugh easier when im with someone

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When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

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Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

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Clenching your teeth subconsciously, then wondering why your teeth hurt so much afterwards.

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Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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Opens new book to random page. Reads snippet. Smiles to myself when I reach it 1 week later. -epsin

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When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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feel that the horsehead network captchas can read my mind. kind of scary.

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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Wanting something so much. Getting it then wondering what to do next

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Think of numbers as male or female.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.