feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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use any nearby window's reflection you walk by to check on appearance.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Reading the terms of service :O....

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

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Wait until there is nobody in the bathroom and then fart really really loud. Also I flip my pillow every 10 minutes so my head is on the cold side. (try it some time)

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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sometimes i mouth improvised, ridiculous sentences in the mirror to see what i look like when i talk to people

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.