Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Sometimes I kiss my hand and pretend it's a person I like.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Find it impossible to get rid of the itch on the bottom of my feet or my palms when they're itchy

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Without thinking i ask questions i know the answer to

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I would try to make my pencil shavings as long as possible.

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Fantasizing about your friends in like 25 years telling there teenage kids about growing up and being friends with you. When you are a huge rich and famous star.

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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sit in the shower

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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Sometimes, for no real reason, I'll make strange or funny noises when no one is around.

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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I eat spoons of dry hot chocolate powder when nobody is around.

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Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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When I'm getting shouted out i blur my eyes and think of something else :3

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okay,So we bought a 1000 piece puzzle and made a point to put it together when it was done we found that it was missing a piece so we went back to the same store bought the same puzzle and went through it until we found the missing piece then returned it.

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.