Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

when I'm walking i always try to step over the cracks with the same foot every time

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

I brush my teeth while im in the shower

When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

Wiggle my foot befor u go sleep in bed!!??

sometimes playing on music on your iPod you think people will like even though you're wearing headphones and nobody can hear you

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

Seperate your food on you dinner plate

get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

Count the amount of birthday wishes on your facebook page, and compare it to other friends birthdays.

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.