I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.

When ever a door is about to close I always try to put my hand between the door and stop it, but it gets to small and I get scared.

When I'm eating ice cream in a bowl I stir it until it becomes like ice cream soup.

Close all the windows on my computer when parents walk in.

Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

Make hand gestures when talking on phone

I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Apply hand sanitizer after fapping.

Whenever I cross the road with someone I try to walk faster then them just in case a car comes it won't drive me over.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Fake a yawn to see if other people will yawn back.

Made after doomsday plans

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

Whenever I switch sides on my bed, I feel like when I turn around some scary clown face is going to be RIGHT THERE in my face

write a test and the information i studied most is not on the test

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.