Not answer a question or something of the sort Evan if you know you know the answer because you are paranoid that you are wrong.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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eat chicken, lamb anything with bones with a knife and fork while avoiding using your hands because it makes them dirty

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Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

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I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

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Say "ow" when I drop something or before I get hurt

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When I have headphones in, I wonder if my swallowing is extremely loud for everyone else too.

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

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When I was younger I'd lay in bed & think about who I would pick if a person told me that I had to choose between 2 people and the 1 that I don't choose will die.

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Go outside and pee.

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I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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When i'm eating M&Ms, I save one of each color until the end so I can eat them all at once.

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I mustn't step on the cracks in the pavement

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when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

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Walking down stairs. Accidently miss last step. Feel like you're going to die.

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Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

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When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

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whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.