If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

conundrum.

Promise to save money then spends all of it anyway.

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

Not knowing whether to change it or not on a scantron test when the same letter appears more than 3 times in a row: A D C C C C .....but all the of my answers make sense!

Thinking about how fast you blink and how many times you have blinked. You then start blinking too much because you are thinling about yourself blinking, and you try to stop, but you can't stop thinking about it.

Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

When the adverts come on I forget what I'm watching and so spend five minutes trying to remember.

after a shower, try to shake the water off.

Sometimes I have a dream in the morning that I checked my clock but then when I wake up Im perplexed when Ive gone back in time -Ethan

When on a long car ride, i tend to look out the window and imagine that i am running on the side of the car and doing flips and other types of parkour to keep up with my car...

Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

In school trying to do a small fart because it really hurting and suddnly a earthquake happens

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.