You come across a movie on network television, you own it, you can see the DVD on the shelf, it would take you less then 30 seconds to put the DVD on, instead you watch it on that station, commercials and all.

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When I have nothing do do in Life Science I read the textbook.

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pick leaves of bushes while im walking and rip them up into small pieces

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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When I'm reading a story in English class or a book in general but I'm tired while doing so and I'm reading on down the page, if I read a sentence and miss a word or mispronounce a word I MUST go back and re read the entire sentence until I have read it correctly or I feel very weird and panicked.

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Try to flip the dice at the casino to my number with my mind

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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I'm so used to pooping with my phone that everytime I forget it I take less than 5 minutes, versus the usual 26.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.

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http://www.todayswhatsappstatus.com/

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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When you are looking over someones shoulder and they look at you thinking you are staring at them so you suddenly turn your head

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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I think about other women when having sex

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.