I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Courtesy flush.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

thumb_up thumb_down -62

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

thumb_up thumb_down -84

After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -84

Make odd grunting noises and sighs of relief while going #2.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

sing really loud to songs in the car, but stop when people are right next to you at stoplights.

thumb_up thumb_down +653

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

thumb_up thumb_down +641

I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Sometimes I wonder if my whole life is a hallucination and I'm actually in some padded room somewhere, talking to myself and staring into space while my real family mourns the fact that their daughter will never be able to live a real life...

thumb_up thumb_down +689

i would air drum even if theres no music playing

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

thumb_up thumb_down -35

When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

when i watch tv and it cuts to break, if i hear someone on the tv tell me not to change the chanel, ill say "u cant tell me what to do!" and then ill change it.

thumb_up thumb_down +248

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.