Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

When i'm eating M&Ms, I save one of each color until the end so I can eat them all at once.

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

Thinking your life is a movie...

Have a dream that you can breath under water and wake up and be very disappointed

Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

during texting you set your phone in your lap right before a car is about to pass you so they dont see you texting and driving

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.