Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Sit at your desk at work and think to yourself "is this it? I feel like I was meant for something bigger, like being an actor or a real life hero." then you look around you and feel bad because you feel like you dumped on everyone else who seem happy wih their lives. Then you go back to your boring desk job anyway.

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"Oh, that was a messed up thought, probably shouldn't think about it again or something worse because---GODDAMN IT."

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Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

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Ur mum

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

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When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

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When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

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I have to check my closet for monsters so they don't get me while I sleep

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I light my pubes on fire instead of shaving them because they aren't as itchy that way.

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when I take a big dump I turn around to see how big it is

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Being all alone in your house and your mind starts to believe its haunted.

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Pretending you're in a tribute band when you listen to a song.

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i use dental dams

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When looking for something you need, just walk in circles around the house until it appears.

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Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.