check shower for murder then pee

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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1.Open the fridge...nothing to eat :/ 2.Open the cabinet...nothing to eat :/ 3.Lower expectations..and then repeat :)

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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I think about other women when having sex

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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When I was younger, I would always try to construct some type of car by using the plastic things from Push-Ups as wheels.

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Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.