Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I see some one I have a crush on in the hallway and I walk towards them and brush my arm against them and be like OMG I TOUCHED HER!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Give your neighbors names from movies.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I always feel a little twinge of regret when I see "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service," because I know it's a lie.

thumb_up thumb_down +354

The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

HEY! YOU! Yeah you! I can speak you only, NO! Nobody else here! Yeah you only you, by the way you are a dirty piece of s**t you mothe* F**ker! YEAH ITS YOU! I HATE YOU! EVERYBODY HATES YOU YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! *end of special message just for you*

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Being from another country and always thinking in english.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

When walking in a pub or a mall or any place which has music playing, I walk along with the beats thinking that I will look super cool doing that!

thumb_up thumb_down -47

If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

thumb_up thumb_down

When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

seeing small spots in your eye (dust probably) and then chasing them with your eye trying to catch them

thumb_up thumb_down +44

When I am listening to my ipod in the car or on a bus, i always remove an earphone to check if i am breathing really loudly.

thumb_up thumb_down +142

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.