when im on my phone in bed my phone always falls on my face -.-

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

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Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?

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Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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When doing your hair or makeup you pretend your doing a tutourial when nones around

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hate it when the bottom of you foot is itchy because it feels wrong to scratch it.

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When I fap at friends house, I use mobile data instead of his wifi incase history can be seen

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I have seen one of my submissions listed under "Quotes from other sites"

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

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I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming

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Play Minecraft

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Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.