I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

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Go to bed with my left nostril clogged, wake up with my right nostril clogged.

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Go to get a drink and by the time you get there you already forgot what you were doing.

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Running round the house like I'm Lara croft or someone from a video game :D it's fun

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Putting your bra on your dogs dead

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

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At times I get the annoying habbit of counting the notes on a song on my fingers, again and again until it ends with five, if not, I keep doing it until it does so as to not leave a finger left out of the melody.

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When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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i masturbate with my feet

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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when im on my phone in bed my phone always falls on my face -.-

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invent arguments in my head with people to hone my debate skills for future arguments.

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When its nighttime, you walk around the house with one of your small animals in your arms, like it can protect you from anything

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incognito mode on google chrome

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I hate being called "buddy".

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.