See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

Sometimes I beat box when I am alone.

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

Mispronounce a word that you have a billion times before because you couldn't figure out what it said for a second.

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

Wonder if someone is ever doing the exact same thing you are at the moment.

I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

I'm in my twenties and still don't drive.

I dip my pizza crust in soda

Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

Answering questions that weren't directed at me, then awkwardly playing it off like they were talking to you.

When I sneeze I hold my balls ( only when Im alone)

make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

in my mind, traffic cones are called VLC.

after ive done something, or experienced something. when i think back on the days events, i think to myself. "i think ive done that before somewere". i must have a boring existance. its always de ja vu with me.

Wondering who would cry at your funeral

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

I think about all of the things of mine people will find if something happens to me

Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.