Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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I like to eat tomato soup and peanut butter sandwiches...its not as gross as it sounds

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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When one of those sad sappy abused dogs commercials comes on, you change the channel really fast to prevent from crying.

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Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

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Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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Having gay sex

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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Being all alone in your house and your mind starts to believe its haunted.

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Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

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Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

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THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Check behind the shower curtain for a killer.

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When I wear a backpack I constantly check to make sure all the pockets are zipped

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When I'm at someone else's house, clutter sort of bothers me and it makes me want to clean up. At my own house, it feels really weird if there's a lack of clutter, so I like to keep it that way.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.