....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

Feels my beard with my tongue.

Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

Liking the smell of your fart and Poo and denying it to people.

when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

you forget your phone when going to the bathroom, so you search for a shampoo bottle or anything to read or play with in reach.

Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

when i realise for example that my shoes are stinking i get really paranoid and try to cover them under the table or something because i feel that everyone is thinking about it or is covering their nose or stuff

When I sneeze I hold my balls ( only when Im alone)

When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

Breathe.

When I have to use my hands to eat my steak, chew the bones etc (do not tell me that so far this is weird and unusual :P ) I wipe my fingers after each touch => use a whole pack of table tissues :D

See a persons name a place a word or thing in a book computer magazine etc... and right after hearing the same thing on tv or the radio. Vice versa

I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.