when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

when i watch tv and it cuts to break, if i hear someone on the tv tell me not to change the chanel, ill say "u cant tell me what to do!" and then ill change it.

thumb_up thumb_down +250

Do math in ur head at night to help you fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Sit there with my hand just resting down my pants casually when I'm alone. It's comfy!

thumb_up thumb_down +998

I chew around the center of carrots.

thumb_up thumb_down -87

wipe your hands on your pants

thumb_up thumb_down +1,403

When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Attempting to silently sneak a fart, then it erupts from your anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +311

I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

thumb_up thumb_down -118

While lying in the tub the water gets cold so u turn back on the hot water with ur feet bc u are too lazy to get up and turn it on with your hands

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Drinking and dialing people I dated.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -7

You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

thumb_up thumb_down -22

When you accidentally mess up a password, delete the entire thing and redo it since you don't know which part you messed up.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

thumb_up thumb_down -88

I hold my boobs if I'm running upstairs and not wearing a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +232

Waste time looking all over for something and notice it is right where it should be.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.