whenever there are automatic doors at a store i use "the force" to open them

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really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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i take words i just read or said and sing them to the tune of a song

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

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Sometimes I think the whole world is set up, and I feel like I'm living in some kind of Truman Show. I even sometimes say "I know you're there" to the moon.

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When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

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When you are looking over someones shoulder and they look at you thinking you are staring at them so you suddenly turn your head

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

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no magazine on toilet? read shampoo bottle

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.