Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

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Fake a yawn to see if other people will yawn back.

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse.

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Wait until there is nobody in the bathroom and then fart really really loud. Also I flip my pillow every 10 minutes so my head is on the cold side. (try it some time)

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clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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Imagine the perfect video game and wonder why nobody made it yet.

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When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

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If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

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Whenever I switch sides on my bed, I feel like when I turn around some scary clown face is going to be RIGHT THERE in my face

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When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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use my phone as an alarm clock for waking up. but sets the time in PM instead of AM.

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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When ever a door is about to close I always try to put my hand between the door and stop it, but it gets to small and I get scared.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

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Hum up and down in pitch because it makes LED displays dance around.

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Judge a stranger in your mind (God, they're ugly/fat etc.) then wonder if they heard you thinking it.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.