I daydream about what would happen if my phone rang in public and I had a ringtone of a cool song and what people think about the song and if they think I'm cool for it, or if they see some sort of symbolic meaning in the song. I do this while pacing around my room listening to the song. I think about what people I know would think about certain lyrics in the song. I do this all the time.

When I walk the streets after getting a new haircut, I think everybody's staring at me and thinking "oh my god she got a new haircut" eventhough they didn't know me before.

Suppress a sneeze and then walk around unsatisfied.

Doing something bad, then being ashamed because you think your dead family members watch you doing it saying tsk tsk

get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

Make funny fish faces and noises in the mirror just because... Oh yeah, and fish totally make noise, right?

I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

Stick ur thumb between ur first and middle finger without realizing it

When I'm bored I think of what it would be like to be a women.

when no one is home I grab my sisters boobs she has big ones I mean it.

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

When I'm at someone else's house, clutter sort of bothers me and it makes me want to clean up. At my own house, it feels really weird if there's a lack of clutter, so I like to keep it that way.

See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

when you bleed you suck your own blood

Sometimes I wipe my butt so violently that my finger goes through the toilet paper and into my butt hole. I enjoy it and question my sexuality. ;)

when someone asks you to not listen to they conversation and your listening to music at the same time, in the same room and when they have that conversation, you pretend to listen to your music.

For the long meaningless comments below: I choose to decide to thumb the comments down and see them gone forever! Moral: Thats right, I spend less time on the webs, but here I am.

I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

Think up a come back three days after it would have been useful.

When I'm riding in a car, i squeeze my toes everytime the car passes a dotted line in the road or when theres a curb

whenever I see those commercials where there is two people talking to each other but they constantly look at me it really irritates me

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.