See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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Sometimes I beat box when I am alone.

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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Mispronounce a word that you have a billion times before because you couldn't figure out what it said for a second.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Wonder if someone is ever doing the exact same thing you are at the moment.

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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I'm in my twenties and still don't drive.

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I dip my pizza crust in soda

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

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When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

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Answering questions that weren't directed at me, then awkwardly playing it off like they were talking to you.

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When I sneeze I hold my balls ( only when Im alone)

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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in my mind, traffic cones are called VLC.

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after ive done something, or experienced something. when i think back on the days events, i think to myself. "i think ive done that before somewere". i must have a boring existance. its always de ja vu with me.

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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I think about all of the things of mine people will find if something happens to me

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Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.