I wonder if we're actually just dolls and are being controlled by some little girl in her little doll house ....

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suck my own penis

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I Masturbate Daily.

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I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

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When no one's at home, the house turns into an action movie set. Going to my room turns into sprinting up the stairs and purposely stumbling to give the effect that bombs are going off. And always make it to the room in time to hop on the last helicopter out of the jungle.

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Sometimes I imagine what it would look like if I was seeing out of another person's eyes across from where I happen to be.

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When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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When I haven't looked in a mirror for a while, I worry that I look awful, and when I get to a mirror, I'm like "Oh yeah, that's what I look like".

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Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

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I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

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When I sneeze I hold my balls ( only when Im alone)

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I wish I was born again, but I had all of the knowledge I have now.

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Mentally preparing yourself to step on a crunchy-looking leaf, only to discover it is in fact soggy, soft and unsatisfactory.

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Before i go to sleep, i imagine all the things i would like to happen in the future, and hoping it comes true or ill dream of it

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When walking outside by myselff and listening to music, I mouth the words and pretend im the singer of the song in their music video.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Drying yourself after the shower with a towl, wiping your ass dry and beeing scared when you dry other parts of your body you dont use the same part of the towl.

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Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

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Secretly open a packet of something or spray some deodorant in a shop to check what it looks/feels/smells like. Then put it back and pick up the one behind because you just used/opened the one you were just holding.

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When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

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Pick my nose with my elbow, that way I keep my nails clean.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.