draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

Hot in bed? Stick one leg out and then wrap it around the top of the duvet

I play video games with the controller under the covers.

i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

Look at the clock, then instantly forget what time it is and look again.

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.

Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

I let everyone know I'm a lesbian as soon as I meet them, ('cause I wouldn't want to continue talking to someone who hates gays).

laziness .... its all in the mind

I have autofocus in my eyes.

look for old friends on facebook to see what they are up to now

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.