Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

masturbate quietly in my room.

Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

I have a phobia of incest

Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

Think "When are we ever going to use this in our life?" while sitting bored in school.

When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

Read shampoo bottle when no magazine in bathroom.

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*

Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

Sing really loudly and think you hear someone come in. yell "hello" for five minutes before singing again.

I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.