Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

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When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

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I talk to myself when I'm alone

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Pick scabs and eat them.. and when i start bleeding suck the blood up with my mouth...

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sometimes when I listen to a song while riding in the car I look out the window and pretend I'm in some angsty music video

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

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I smell or rinse cups before I put water in them. Even if they are clean.

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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think that things u do aren't gross and when other people do them its disgusting

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look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

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I cant ride a bike

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I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

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I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Turn the Microwave off at 1 second

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

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I laugh easier when im with someone

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Being so socially awkward that when you have a successful interaction with another human being, you play it in your head over and over again.

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I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.