I hold my breath in elevators

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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I feel no shame that I am a camgirl online and bring in about $2800 a month just to flash guys my boobs. :)

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I freak myself out during class/assembly/family dinners that someone there can read my mind, then just on cue I start thinking about sex and have to change my train of thought before they think I'm strange. Then I go round in a circle (clockwise of course) and scream their names in my head to see if they look so I know who reads minds.

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Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

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Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

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when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

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Write "my opinion thinking-aloud-sentences" on the "circle the answer" test as footnotes when I'm not sure about the answer.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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I actually get stuck watching those rediculous infomercials late at night... Yeah - you're not alone. But no, I don't buy anything either... Lol.

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put the volume on the TV as an even number, and feeling uncomfortable if it's on an odd number

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I mouth common words and phrases, just to see what it looks like when I talk to other people.

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Buying a new song, listening to it on repeat for hours until it gets old, and then never listening to it again.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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Covering the movement sensors with toilet paper on public toilets incase it's a secret camera.

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Admit, that most of your saved files on you´re computer have titles like: sdfdshleh / sjjs87 / sjflekeh

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carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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You imagine your future self visiting you and tell you about your life.

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I invented this game in the bathroom called "start peeing before the light fully lightens up".Its kind of a challenge because if i actually succeed i might not pee in the right place.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.