DIY LOL
Car Failures
Republican Equals
Scumbag Steve
Tattoo Failure
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Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.
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+1,615
think something you shouldn't, then stop thinking it, because someone might read your mind
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+1,340
when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.
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+13
Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.
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+324
When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"
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-57
get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.
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-55
I eat food when i'm bored..
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+93
daydream/pretend i'm in a story. pretend to be a new person in a movie where all the cool main characters are my friends, add to the movie with my own story and add twists and make it my own.
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-57
When I'm laying in bed, I make sure that my feet are covered and not hanging off the edge so that monsters don't eat them in my sleep.
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+190
Saying "ouch!" when someone throws something and it hits an inanimate object.. -Sarah
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-3
I ejaculate fire and glory
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-62
If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.
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-94
Sometimes I read a whole page of text only to realize I didn't actually read any of it. Then I read it again. Sometimes this happens more than 3 times for one page.
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+2,729
I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now
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-18
Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol
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-7
Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.
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-38
Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"
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-7
Yelling my cats name in my mind to see if i can get him to look at me using the power of my mind
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-115
Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?
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+1,410
Seperate your food on you dinner plate
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-49
When I am home alone and I hear something upstairs, I pretend my Dad is here and say really loudly, "Hey Dad! When are you going to your violent national wrestling match tonight?!"
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-36
Buying a new song, listening to it on repeat for hours until it gets old, and then never listening to it again.
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-16
Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second
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-51
when u see a blond, brown,black,or red head girl u think of a blond,brown,black or red head joke -Randi L.
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-60
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.