Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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i make loud noises so before i fart people cant hear it.

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I often think about how I am a thing inside of a body

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When I'm about to fart, I close my butthole with cupped hand to smell my own fart. Sometimes after I fart, I bend down just to smell the scent.

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

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Read weird posts like this one on the HorseHead Network.

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I rearrange books, movies, etc. in the correct alphabetical order in the fiction section of my public library, other people's houses, classrooms at school, etc. Sometimes this process takes a very long time.

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I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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When the adverts come on I forget what I'm watching and so spend five minutes trying to remember.

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I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

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you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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When drunk, I often grab something, lift it into the air, and yell "I GOT THE POWER!" just in case it turns me into He-Man.

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when someone goes underwater in a movie I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived in that situation, I almost died during Finding Nemo

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.