Wonder if certain people can read my mind... start thinking weird stuff and try to stop.

think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot

Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

Fart and walk away from the stink area very quickly so nobody will know you made it.

Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

Every time I watch the movie I cry when the babysitter sings that song in the blues bar in the movie "Adventures In Babysitting"

When a room is dark and the light is really far away, I close my eyes to feel my way to the lamp.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

When I'm at someone else's house, clutter sort of bothers me and it makes me want to clean up. At my own house, it feels really weird if there's a lack of clutter, so I like to keep it that way.

arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

When bored in class.. I catch eyes with someone across the room and look away fast, then act "cool" for the next 10 minutes because I still think they're looking at me...

When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

I rape small children ;).

sometimes i sing and when i do , i make drum sounds with my teeth and you know, all that stuff

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.