I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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when i am in a long car ride i look out the window and imagine im in a sad music video

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At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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See a persons name a place a word or thing in a book computer magazine etc... and right after hearing the same thing on tv or the radio. Vice versa

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.