I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

when i am in a long car ride i look out the window and imagine im in a sad music video

At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

See a persons name a place a word or thing in a book computer magazine etc... and right after hearing the same thing on tv or the radio. Vice versa

I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.