Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

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When I'm listening to my ipod on a road trip I look out the window longingly and pretend to be in a music video

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When walking into a smelly bathroom, hold your breath so you don't have to breathe in the poo air.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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I pretend to get future messages. Like when I'm about to have a bad subject. I get a message from future me telling present me like 'Oh god. Yeah, brace yourself for science today.'

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I put a small amount of water in glasses and freeze them for hot days when I want a cool drink

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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Tear up when I poop

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No matter how complicated your shower is at home, you always find it much easier to work than other people's showers.

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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When a lot if people are yelling at me / disagreeing with me all at once, I start laughing.

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When on long car rides, I always look out the window and imagine a little man running alongside the car.

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When I'm in the shower i let the water run off my arms and fingers and pretend I'm a giant god of water sending torrents to the miniature people below.

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When your friend tells you something, but you don't hear them so you just start laughing.

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When i take off my watch before i go to sleep i smell my wrist.

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Every time I go in a bathroom I have to look behind the shower curtain.

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I can't brush my teeth with the toilet lid up.

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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I cover my webcam on my when I fap in fear that someone/something is watching.

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Cough and shift my feet a lot when someone comes into the public bathroom so they know someone is in the stall and won't walk in on me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.