Trying to take the same number of steps in a block of sidewalk while you're walking.

SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

wonder if anyone is on at 12 A.M. log on to a social network and realize that theres a lot of people on

I piss excellence, shit suppority and whip myself with greatness.

When in the shower, try to cross your arms and keep them as high up to your head as you can. Fill them with water and drink from it.

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

I wonder what a baby is saying when they are telling you off?

Throw mini celabration of clock says 11:11, 9:11 or anything ending in :00

Hate when you finish a cup of pudding or something like that and you don’t want to get up to put the spoon in the sink so you just leave it sitting in the cup but the spoon is too tall for the cup and it falls over.

imagine killing someone by accident and feeling really guilty about it.

Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

Sometimes when I look at something up close, I alternate closing each eye and looking at the object from the other eye, then switch again. I do it really fast to make it look like that thing is moving. It's really entertaining.

I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

Admit, that most of your saved files on you´re computer have titles like: sdfdshleh / sjjs87 / sjflekeh

I pretend I'm a musical when I'm alone and sing about all the stuff I'm doing.

Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.