I think people especially my parents, can hear my thoughts

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Repeat the phrase "you too" after a comment someone makes that does not apply. Bob: happy birthday Jim Jim: you too bob. Awwww sh!t.

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Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

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Change my name on Siri on iPhone to something hillarius and make it say my name

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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Wonder what I would have said to my dad if I knew he was going to die

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blow nose. look at kleenex.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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When I'm about to fart, I close my butthole with cupped hand to smell my own fart. Sometimes after I fart, I bend down just to smell the scent.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

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sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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Be a loner at school

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Reading a book and making the facial expressions it describes.

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When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)

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Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

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Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.