Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

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while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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I like to say really offensive and/and racist words when I'm on my own and no one can hear me. It just feels good to say things that I'm not allowed to.

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You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

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When i need to poop i place toilet paper over the water so it doesn't splash up and hit my rectum.

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When using the bathroom count the tiles on the floor or shower wall or read a shampoo bottle.

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Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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whenever there's a fight on facebook, i sit back and read it and i'm just like "people are stupid hehe"

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ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

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pretend you died to see what your dog would do.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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Say 'WED', 'NES' and 'DAY' slowly in your head when spelling Wednesday.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.