When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

when looking for lost keys i return to the place they should be at least 5 times and look there

when i am in a long car ride i look out the window and imagine im in a sad music video

when two pictures look very similar, i go back and forth between them so it looks like they're moving

Scan forward to best parts of songs, rarely listen to entire song.

When I'm home alone, I get paranoid and think that someone is watching me and I try to act cool and funny just to impress them.

Think something that you REALLY don't want to think and hurriedly force your mind to change its thoughts.

Saying "ouch!" when someone throws something and it hits an inanimate object.. -Sarah

I gotta get down of Friday

draw little triangles while coulouring in to make it seem that theres not so much work -jesse

Breathe.

While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

Gotta sleep with a fan.

When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

Say you're not hungry at a friend's house when his/her parents offer you food, even though you're starving

Whenever i wear long sleeves i always hold onto the sleeves with my ring and pinkie fingers.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.