wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

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When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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I pretend I'm a musical when I'm alone and sing about all the stuff I'm doing.

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Say a word I just learned over and over again until it loses meaning.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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get annoyed when people talk on the phone really loudly in front of the TV, forcing you to mute your show, resulting in you missing half of what the people are saying.

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Pee in the shower

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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Agree with someones ridiculous political opinion just to avoid an argument.

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lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

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RAPE CHILDREN

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when I have to shred important documents I am still not satisfied that I even burn the shredded paper

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When I am at amusement parks I look and determine which guys I could beat up and which I couldn't.

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Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

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thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.