When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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When you look in the mirror, and it ruins your whole day.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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I eat food when i'm bored..

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I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

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When I'm bored I argue with myself inside my head.

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whenever I lucid dream, I find that I don't do much

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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I constantly try to turn something I say into my catch phrase.

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after a shower, try to shake the water off.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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I vote thumb dlown the ones that i dong like

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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if someone posts something disgusting but true on this same site, rethink pressing the "thumbs up" button out of embaressment.

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Wanting to be the Walmart baby model as a kid ^_^

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.