give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

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When I'm driving through traffic lights that are green, I use my psychic powers to make them change so no one behind me gets through.

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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When in a room with a bunch of people, see the one person who's extremely cute and then get a random boner and think "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY"

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k. everyone

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

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Pretend to talk on the phone when you see someone you don't want to say hello.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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I often wonder if people ever talk about me, when I'm away.

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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when i wake up from a dream and it was an amazing dream. then i try to fall back asleep to have it again...it doesn't work

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.