when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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I keep tearing the little piece of skin next to my thumb nail until it hurts - and even if it bleeds I have to get it off.

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Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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I always twist my washcloth into a cone shape, so when I take my next shower it is dry and hardened. Then I pretend stab it into my stomach and say "MY LIFE FOR AIUR!" before getting it wet again.

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

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speak proper english

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

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If no one else is home and you have to go to the bathroom, but you're invested in what you're doing on your laptop, you take it with you.

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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I sit up all night on the computer/xbox then when people ask if i have slept i just lie and say yes to avoid the drama.

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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Try to flip the dice at the casino to my number with my mind

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When the car runs over bumps in the road on the freeway, they sound like horses hooves, so I pretend my car's being pulled by invisible horses.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.