When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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Imagine I'm being filmed in a reality TV show just so I could do something productive or interesting.

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Dancing while hoovering

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Clenching my fists, imagining I have wolverine claws coming out of my knuckles

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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While washing your hair in the shower, having the weird fear of opening your eyes to see something staring at you.

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When people are whispering you think they are saying bad things

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sometimes I get so bored watching tv that I have an incredible urge to throw the remote at the tv. I would never do it, but I always fear I might and break the tv.

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When i am bored i go on the internet and i dont know what to do but as soon as i turn off my computer i come up with lots of fun things i could have done

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Whenever I'm home alone, I dance and sing along to any commercial.

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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hallo

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fart

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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When you are doing something (kind of weird) when you're alone and then stop because there might be a ghost watching.

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.